Waiting for the Test Results.

Robert Williams paced back and fourth smoking a cigarette. He wore a dark gray suit and tie, with a fedora. He was white, his hair short and graying, his eyes blue. He was tall, about six four, with an oval face. “What is taking so long?” he demanded to no one, taking the cigarette from his mouth. He took another drag from the cigarette.

John Smith sat in a seat, his eyes closed. He was white, with brown short hair. He was also wearing a gray suit and tie. He was a little shorter then Al, and had a squarish face. “It will come when it comes, complaining will not make them finish sooner.”

“It was supposed to be done a half hour ago!” Robert took a drag, to the filter, put the cigarette out in an ashtray, took another cigarette and lit it.

Hearing the lighter John opened his eyes, looked at Robert, “Is that your fourth cigarette in eight minutes?”

“It calms my nerves.”

Closing his eyes, “There are better ways.” John replied.

“This is better.” Robert said, the cigarette in his hand. He took another drag, continuing to pace.

John looked at Robert, “Will you sit down!” he demanded, “You’re making me anxious.”

Robert went to sit to the left of Zack, stood, took a fedora out of the, placed it on John’s lap then sat.

“Just clear your mind and remember your mantra.”

“I tried that crap, it doesn’t work with me.” Robert responded, took another drag from his cigarette, finishing it. He tossed the butt to the ash try, missing it. He went to get another cigarette but the pack was empty. “Great!” he exclaimed sarcastically.

“Are you going to pick that up?” John asked.

“No.” Robert answered. Robert sat there his left leg shaking.

“Please stop that.” John requested.

“I’m out of cigarettes.”

“I think I preferred you pacing.”

“Th- th- this is our chance to be something big and not just support. How are you not nervous?” Robert asked turning towards John

“Self control.” John answered calmly, closing his eyes.

“Bah!” Robert exclaimed looking forward.

Finally a doctor came out.

“About time.” Robert exclaimed then stood. John looked to his left then stood.

“The tests are done, you both pass for human.” The doctor told them, and handed them a copy of their results with an orange that had two thumbs.

They took the results from the creature with orange skin, a wide head, purple sclera and orange irises.

They looked at each other smiling. “The big time.” John said.

The two walked away, Robert telling John: “You have to start smoking, it’s a big deal on Earth.”

A beam quickly flashed from the sky above L.A., the molecules making up John and Robert were assembled into them, in the suburbs of L.A.. They were now wearing trench coats and carrying brown brief cases. They walked a short way to a bus stop.

The bus arrived, the two got on John first. “Whats the fare?” John asked.

“Dollar seventy fife.” The driver answered.

The two looked at each other, John took out his wallet, took three dollars, then two quarters from a coin purse. He went to hand them to the driver, the driver looked at him then patted the pay machine. John looked at the machine put the three dollars in one slot, dropped the two quarters in another slot.

Walking into the bus they were stopped by a man in jeans, a t-shirt, and with a tattoo on his neck or a pidgin. “Dude!” The man exclaimed, “Awesome costumes. Are you going to the convention?”

“Um, yes.” Robert lied not knowing how to answer.

“Awesome, can I get a picture?”

“Yes.” John answered in an uncertain voice.

The man got between them, took out his smart phone and took a selfie with them, his arm around John. “This is going on Twitter!” he then spoke out what he was typing into his phone: “I just got arrested by two g-men, I was making moonshine for Capone, ell oh ell, smiley face, smiley face.” He looked at the two men, “Thank you. Awesome guys.”

Sitting in a seat they looked over at a man long hair in the adjacent seat, air drumming and head banging.

Robert looked at John, “I think there was some issues with our inelegance.”

In writing this I had to look up the cost of riding the bus in LA, its $1.75, here it’s $3. Fuck you RTD.